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There is a hole in my yard. Well, it's not so much a hole, it's more a strip of missing grass. After 2 days of work and some minor muscle ache, I achieved what looks like a bad wax job on our lawn.

It was Sunday. We had had the kind of week where you just kinda have to make it work.

Imagine that it's 11 am. You've had the rare opportunity to stay in bed as long as you want today and you're now ready to start your day. You grab a bite to eat, a coffee perhaps, and you start work. You're still a bit sluggish and maybe procrastinate a bit. If you could have it your way, this time would be spent socializing with friends. After 3 PM you come alive and get into the flow to do some work. Working form home, you prefer to work at night and you easily stay productive until midnight.

I used to be a perfectionist. My perfectionism led to crippling procrastination in the past and a lot of (what in hindsight I can only call) self-sabotage. Like when I tried to learn "how to be an entrepreneur" off the internet for nearly a year while I was unemployed and before I started my first business 4 years ago. Or how I tried to learn about marketing and messaging by reading blog after blog but never sent out a single social post or email myself.

Sometimes I wish I were more glitz and glamour. There is something awe-inspiring about it: People living that #amazing life with a millionaire nomad lifestyle. When I wrote this (in the midst of the pandemic) no one was traveling but lots of us were reliving memories of past vacations and so looking forward to when we can all travel again. But even my best memories of past vacations pale in comparison to some of the people I follow. Luxurious all-expenses paid trips to Bali by private jet, is that something I someday aspire to?

I used to write poetry and, a few years ago, I wrote a poem called More. It was about my hunger for a bigger, better, fuller life and how I worked incredibly hard to achieve it. I wanted to make something of myself and have a great career that other people would envy. I was ready to climb that corporate ladder and everything was geared toward more: Work more, get more results, become more important, make more money, just more.

How do you feel about midday naps?

Some people love them and never skip their powernap or that good old siesta. Other people are just put off by napping of any kind because they just can't seem to calm their mind long enough to actually fall asleep or because somehow it feels wrong or wasteful to nap in the middle of the day. 

DISC training, personality assessments, negotiation courses, debate workshops, quizzes to find out "What *personality/leader/unicorn* type are you?"; I've pretty much done it all. Somewhere deep down, I used to feel that I was a bad communicator. People never seemed to "get" me and the blanc stare was an ever-present danger that needed to be avoided at all cost. Maybe that's part of the reason why I didn't like being in unknown social situations. Like me at a party when someone asks "So, what do you do?" [Oh god noooo, don't talk to me, aaaaaah!]